Thursday, August 31, 2006

Which Is More Creepy?

I think John Mark Karr makes the little girl in all of us scream. I don't care if this guy is not guilty of killing Jon Benet. He needs to be dismissed from class permantly.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Look at That Big Ole Thang

I live in Texas, but I just don't understand the mindless masses who feel like they need a giant mud buggy in a city the size of Houston. I wrote a song about. Like ta hear it, here it goes:

Look at me
I drive truck
Cause I’m a Texas fuck

You know my ego and nuts
Are tied to the size of my truck
Cause there's nothing else
Down under my pelt

Smash the pedal to the floor
Gas ain’t no obstacle
If you can outrun the constable
And a helicopter, and his radio and a T.V. camera…

Look at me
I drive an SUV
It’s as big as can be
No, I don’t have a family

I’m from Texas
Where we drive small homes on wheels
And we live in homes with wheels
And practical vehicles give us chills

Shit hot-damn don’t mess wit me
I drive the latest big SUV
Cause my poor poor peepee
Makes me look like a she she

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Latin Miracles

I admit I have watched a fair amount of spanish TV. Yes, the latin women are hot and I wish my spanish was better. Oh well, body language will have to do. The one thing I can't figure out is all of the miracle weight loss creams that are available to latin americans while us gringos have none. What to do?